HOPE & BRAVERY | A PROPHETIC MANTRA

“GO IN WITH HOPE & WALK OUT WITH BRAVERY.”

I texted this to a friend in a split second of her nervousness & need earlier today. it wasn’t until just a few minutes ago that I realize it was one of those moments.

you know the ones.

you say something, text something… and later, it comes back to haunt you. the very thing you spoke over another person drifts back to you like a gentle mist and begins to manifest in your life. it chills you with realization, wakes you up a bit, and stirs you with its power.

I happen to have been given the grace of a prophetic gift. I’ve always felt more… spiritual? I guess?… than people my age. more connected to the universe & to the souls of the people around me, while simultaneously feeling detached from the hum-drum and buzz of everyday concerns. it manifested in an eerily accurate intuition, a gift for encouragement, and a sensitivity to the still, small Voice. it took me a while to discern that this was a prophetic gift.

it’s taken me still longer to really participate in my own gifts. but I’m learning. I’m always learning.

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but there are times when I’m surprised by it- like today. Continue reading “HOPE & BRAVERY | A PROPHETIC MANTRA”

EMBRACING THE LIFE YOU NEVER WANTED

EMBRACING THE LIFE YOU NEVER WANTED

life has a nasty habit of socking you in the mouth just when you’ve managed to get back up from the last time you fell on your face. or is that just me?

didn’t think so.

oh, sweet souls… life is hard, right? well, today, in the midst of a 30+ minute car ride, during which we had to pull over and pop some pills so I wouldn’t vomit up the small amount of food I’d managed to pack away, I had a revelation.

the past few days, which were supposed to be a vacation, have instead been full of sickness and emergency rooms. for the past three years, it’s felt like crap has rained down on us and broken us every time we thought we would catch our breath. and here’s the first part of my revelation:

you can’t wait for it to stop. you can’t even expect it to stop. 

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because, while it may sound depressing, the truth is that this world is desperately broken. the truth is that this world will take and take and take; it will break you into pieces, and, if you are looking for it, light will shine through those pieces and that light will be relief to your soul.  Continue reading “EMBRACING THE LIFE YOU NEVER WANTED”

WRESTLE WITH GOD

oh, babes…

it seems that these days, each 24 hour cycle is one of absurd ups and downs that are a dizzying pendulum of heartache and delight.
and I’m coming down from an upswing into a canyon.

it’s easy to demonize myself. it’s easy to shame my doubts into silence, to lock away my frustration into a box marked DANGER! FLAMMABLE! it’s easy to push it all away.

until it isn’t so easy anymore. 

until there’s so much grief and so much unfairness and so much frustration that just burying another box of it simply won’t do. and when the old ways of brushing off & under these wounds no longer do, there is only one thing that will.

the only thing left to do is wrestle.

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I have a very wise, wild, warrior-sister in a cousin of mine. she has felt the depths of loss, and she has dared, as few have, to wrestle with God.

wrestling is hard.
wrestling is brave.
wrestling is essential to the survival of those who stare down mountains. Continue reading “WRESTLE WITH GOD”

BEING LOVED IS BRAVE

hey babes.

we’re living an incredibly painful & difficult season over here in the Avrick house. that sounds like a broken record, doesn’t it? yeah. well, to be honest, the past three years have been both the hardest & best of our lives. and it just keeps going.

but I’m learning things. oh, how I’m learning. there’s nothing like a trial to plant you deeper, darker into black soil and then revel in your wild growth.

and here’s one of the freshest, most in-process truths I’m starting to tentatively sink into… being loved is brave. yeah.

letting yourself be loved. like, really sacrificially loved. it’s hard for me. it takes everything in me to soften and allow hands of love to be opened in my direction.

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it opens years of wounding, years full of fear that I’m a burden, that I’m too much to carry, that maybe I’m a waste, that I’m just a troublesome human clinging to affection. it’s close to impossible to be loved in big, mountain-moving ways without me feeling those old haunts coming back to wrap their toxins around my fragile heart.

it feels like an insurmountable task- to be fully loved. Continue reading “BEING LOVED IS BRAVE”

DEAR FRIEND

Dear friend…

if you are feeling lost, alone, marginalized, heartbroken, or hopeless, know this:

I AM FOR YOU.

JESUS IS WITH YOU.

you are not alone. there may be those who would desire to rip you apart, but sweet soul, they don’t win.

we who hold true & cling fast to the heart of our precious Jesus will always find those on our side. we will always find hope when we need it. we will always find sweet peace & a gentle home for our weary souls when we feel we cannot go on.

so when you are living in fear and looking around at a world broken with pride & hatred, remember this…


come back to your breath. this is the core of your physical & emotional self.

recognize that growth involves mourning. saying goodbye to the old things is painful, and it’s really really good.

release the toxic things. they stunt your growth. they break your will.

cling to what is good. this is your lifeline because all good is from Jesus.

remember your inherent worthiness as a daughter of Divine Love. you’ve been filled with a brilliant breath of glory. and yes, you’re worthy. worthy. worthy

know that your wild can also be your holy. 

love yourself fiercely, the way your are SO LOVED by the Divine, and let that love spill over to soak everyone around you with that fearless, brave, intentional LOVE.

we will make it through this. together.

BE MOVED

I was listening to a song in the car today.

I was making my way to my favorite local coffee shop to do some work and was just trying to think and pray for a bit of inspiration to fall out of the sky. I have so much going on in my head, so many things to do, that my inspired self had kind of been taken over by to do lists and requirements. who else has totally been there?

but as I was listening to this song and allowing the beauty of the words and melody to sweep over me, I was moved. nearly to tears, but thoroughly to inspiration.

how often do we let the beauty of it all become the background noise?

how often are we okay with drifting because feeling is just too hard when there are so many aches in our souls?

how often do we allow ourselves to shut down and just make it through the day instead of bravely feeling all that the world has to offer… the good AND the bad?

how hard is it to be shaken from our rigidness and simply be moved?
be changed?
be loved?

be beloved.

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because that is what you are called, beauties.

you are beloved. 
so be. loved. 
and be. love.

but first… be moved.
let the movement show you just how loved you are. just how worthy you are made. just how full of the Divine you are.
just how capable you are of moving others to know these. same. truths.

don’t allow fear to box up your heart and hide it away from feeling. that’s where the apathy sets in. don’t allow the past wounds and hurts to callous over your heart and make you numb. that’s where the bitterness sets in.

keep feeling. keep being moved. keep soaking up the joy.

be moved today.

THIS GLORIOUS HOUSE

hi babes.

it’s been a bit, huh?

lots of processing and healing and (I’ll be real) just plain craziness going down over here. and it’s GOOD. I’ve got some insane stuff that I’m currently working on which will be coming at you next month… and it is honestly just the culmination of some of the biggest dreams & greatest fears of my heart that I didn’t even know I had, y’all. so you’re not gonna want to miss it.

I thought it might be profitable for me to let you into the sweetness that is this journey for me, and to break open some of that breathlessness that has been rebuilding me…

because sometimes I need to be reminded that what comes to me is for me. that what takes part in my deconstruction does, by default, take part in my rebuilding. that all the things that are happening in me now are working to make a greater and more purposeful future that is so worth living.

what about you?

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I love the visualization of being the dwelling place of Grace & Truth.. a house in which the Divine feels at home… a residence for the Spirit of Peace. that is a picture that has always just spoken to me really deeply. and what’s lovely is that in the book of Haggai I get this whole new insight into what that could mean, into what it must mean, as I read about the people of God rebuilding the temple.

“the future glory of this house will be greater than the past glory… and in this place I will give you peace…” Haggai 2:9

Continue reading “THIS GLORIOUS HOUSE”

PALMS OPEN

hi beauties. I love you guys so much.

today I have a really important chat for y’all. it’s not only timely for Palm Sunday, but it’s a valuable & precious mantra for a lifetime. yeah. it’s that piercing.

when Jesus entered the city, the people waved palm branches & blessed Him, and later on they received Jesus Himself on the cross. today we open our palms to bless Him still & receive His goodness and blessing.

there’s a term we use in yoga: “palms up to receive.”

as we sit in meditation, or pause, steady in our breath, in a pose full of difficulty, we often remind ourselves or our students to simply turn our hands so our palms face up- a posture of surrender, openness, and release.

it’s a softness, a gentleness, a simplicity in the midst of spiritual tension. it’s an offering in the midst of emotional scarcity. it’s a song of sweetness in the screaming bitter season of the soul.

this is our Palm Sunday everyday.

this is our silent shout of hosanna, defiant in the chaos of a world shrieking with fear & demanding our worry and panic. Continue reading “PALMS OPEN”

FOR THE BRUISED & BUSTED UP

hey there family.

how’s your heart doing? how does life feel against your skin? how’s the weight on your shoulders?

heavy?

yeah… me, too.

because I’ve been struggling real fierce with the weight lately. with the heaviness of all that the world is. all that the Way is. all the healing and woundedness in the world.

I’ve been taking more pauses for deep breaths meant to cleanse and pause and bring shalom into my heart. more because there’s more to breathe against. more to fear. more wounds to bind up.

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the world is heavy, and the weight is fearsome, and the depth of the rawness of our humanity is leagues and leagues more so than the ocean. and we must find a way to breathe through it, to surrender to the healing, even as the arrows pierce our hearts.

and all the bitter hypocrisy, all the callous & graceless acts of others, all the hard work for more disappointment, all the exhaustion and survival, all the confusion and frustration of WHY IS THIS THE WAY IT IS… sometimes it just leaves me bruised & busted up in my soul. Continue reading “FOR THE BRUISED & BUSTED UP”

THE ROAD TO BETHLEHEM IS ALWAYS BITTER… BUT CHRISTMAS IS ALWAYS READY WHEN YOU NEED IT

with Christmas just around the corner (yup, just 26 days…!) and all of the merry hustle and bustle that we love to get swept up in, it can be hard to wrap our heads around the distinct and glaring contrast of the peace that the holiday represents with the unrest and injustice going on in our world today.

I’ve noticed that everyone seems to be in a hurry to get Christmas HAPPENING this year. people seem to be putting up their trees and decorations early, more facebook statuses than usual have been posted with an open longing for the season to begin, and it seems that Christmas music was blaring a couple weeks sooner than it typically is.

I don’t think this is chance- I think there’s a very communal and vocal desperation for the beauty of Christmas this year that hasn’t been quite so loud in recent ones. I think our hearts recognize the reverence and sacredness of Christmas, and this year we’re starved for it. we’re stuffed full of shock and sadness and the ugly unapproachable-ness of our current reality, and we’re just so ready for a little peace and hope and rescuing.

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I think this is where we need to be.  Continue reading “THE ROAD TO BETHLEHEM IS ALWAYS BITTER… BUT CHRISTMAS IS ALWAYS READY WHEN YOU NEED IT”