it seems that these days, each 24 hour cycle is one of absurd ups and downs that are a dizzying pendulum of heartache and delight.
and I’m coming down from an upswing into a canyon.
it’s easy to demonize myself. it’s easy to shame my doubts into silence, to lock away my frustration into a box marked DANGER! FLAMMABLE! it’s easy to push it all away.
until it isn’t so easy anymore.
until there’s so much grief and so much unfairness and so much frustration that just burying another box of it simply won’t do. and when the old ways of brushing off & under these wounds no longer do, there is only one thing that will.
the only thing left to do is wrestle.
I have a very wise, wild, warrior-sister in a cousin of mine. she has felt the depths of loss, and she has dared, as few have, to wrestle with God.
wrestling is hard.
wrestling is brave.
wrestling is essential to the survival of those who stare down mountains. Continue reading “WRESTLE WITH GOD”