YOU ARE NOT A LIABILITY // THE MODESTY MYTHS THAT BREAK & BURY US

MODESTY.

okay babes. can we talk about this word? please?

purity culture, which is a whole massive discussion that can’t be contained in just one blog post (though I made a decent effort here), is rife with the sub-culture of a twisted view of this word “modesty”.

church youth groups are constantly talking about it, from the old catchphrase “modest it hottest!” (let’s all just admit this one was poorly thought through) to the more recent rise of the Great Yoga Pants Wars. for some reason, people are completely obsessed, to a likely unhealthy extent if we’re honest, with modesty.

from the wildly inappropriate comments regarding my body & sex life I received while I was pregnant, to the damnation of the vast majority of swim suits (and often the people who wear them), to suggesting women are to blame for their own objectification, to the brushing off or blaming of sexual abuse victims, to the repulsion with a woman breastfeeding while not hidden in a corner… as these few examples show, so much of the evangelical community is disturbingly obsessed with female bodies.

I think it’s time to destroy some modesty myths here, because beautiful woman… you are not a liability. Continue reading “YOU ARE NOT A LIABILITY // THE MODESTY MYTHS THAT BREAK & BURY US”

SPIRITUAL ABUSE // WHAT IT IS & HOW TO GET FREE

hey fam!

today I want to chat with you about a topic that can be really triggering and scary for some of us. it’s been weighing on my heart & I want to just get this truth out of me and shed some light on it okay?

many of us are probably familiar with the terms of sexual abuse/domestic abuse/emotional abuse… these are all deeply dehumanizing and disturbing behaviors that need to be called out & shut down. but something that so many people I know have been a victim of, and which most people don’t even seem to realize exists, is a despicable thing called spiritual abuse.

what is spiritual abuse?

spiritual abuse comes in many forms and wears many disguises. it can be subtle and hard to recognize or loud and blatant. here are just a few ways it can read its ugly head…

MISUSE OF SCRIPTURE

spiritual abuse most often happens when people throw around scripture incorrectly and without reverence, such as using it: out of context, to shame, to ostracize, to excuse or perpetrate cruel behaviors, to prove a point, to shut down a conversation, to silence, to blame, to mock, to build their high horse, to belittle, to brush off, to shrink your pain, to avoid the topic, to divert attention away from their own faults, with condescension, with anger, without kindness… the list could go on. the bottom line here is this: if you have ever been belittled, shamed, brushed off, silenced, or made to feel like your pain was irrelevant with quoted scripture, you have been a victim of spiritual abuse.


THE NARROW ROAD COMPLEX Continue reading “SPIRITUAL ABUSE // WHAT IT IS & HOW TO GET FREE”