I never really thought of myself as a strong woman.
I realize that goes against so much of what I try to live and say and evoke in others here on the blog, but that’s just how it is. for years, I carried the word “fragile” like a brand- a word that had been jammed into my heart by careless conversation and accidental judgement from those close to me. “yup. fragile. it’s all I am, all I could ever hope to be… just fragile.” my inner dialogue was so abusive!
to this day, being called fragile is a trigger which, while I rarely run into, I continuously have to work through and release because I now recognize it does not belong to me or in me.
I stumbled across the most beautiful portion of scripture yesterday as I was doing some Pinterest research (it is too totally a thing) for something completely unrelated, and I was so enamored that I immediately had to go pull out my Bible and read the full passage to soak in all its goodness. it struck me because it spoke to the fragility we’re afraid lives in us, to the fear of our own perceived weakness, to the bold voice and unapproachable courage we are convinced will never be ours…
you’ve got to hear this, friend.
“beat your plowshares into swords, and your pruning hooks into spears; let the weak say, “I am a warrior.” …bring down your warriors, O Lord.”
// Joel 3:10&11 //
let me open this up a bit for you. Joel (the one who was penning these words) was a prophet for the nation of Israel. he came at a time where the people were suffering under the heavy hand of their own consequences, and he was speaking light into the hardship by assuring Divine rescue and recompense if they would only come back to the heart of what they knew to be true.
these people were scared. they were tired. they were feeling fragile and fed up. they didn’t know how the story was going to end. perhaps they were a little bitter. I’m sure they were just ready to be done.
and in effect, God speaks out from this man and says “I’m coming. get ready. we’re going to fight for your release together. I’m going to battle by your side… but you’ve got to pick up your weapon. even the weakest of you… I’m going to give you the strength to warrior on. I’m going to give you the power to beat this. I’m giving you a warrior spirit. And warriors carry on.”
do you hear it, friend?
no matter the weakness, the fragility, the faltering steps… you have been given a warrior spirit. Jesus is bringing down His warriors into the earth as a force of rescue and redemption, and you are one of them.
so right now just imagine we’re sitting face to face in some homey space, and I’m looking at you and giving you this courageous dare: say it. say you’re a warrior. do it. just try. He’s got you. take your arms and raise them up and lift your weapon that is your warrior heart and warrior the hell out of this angry, cruel, sick world. and warrior the heaven into the broken and the shattered spaces. drag out the hell and breathe in the heaven.
and warrior always and hard and forever because that is the spirit you’ve been given.
you are not weak. you are not fragile. you are not a flawed creation.
you are a wounded creation that has been remade in the fire of pain and affliction.
you are a warrior.